just a bubble on the road

sometimes i get in my own bubble, a comfortable spot, for awhile. a place where i hide, just to be whoever i want to be. no-one to see me, no-one to judge me. and for a little bit i like it, i like being able to control my thoughts, to allow myself to feel anything i please. to focus on what i'm doing at the moment, i get lost, and i forget, but at some point loneliness comes back, and finds it's way back in. and i begin to wonder, is it worth it? it never is. i guess we're created to be together. to share in all lives experience, the good, the great, the bad, and the ugly. i can share the good, and it's so easy to share the great, the bad is do-able, but the ugly, i keep it all mine. even though it's the one that i would love to pass, to get rid of, to never see again. but all is apart, of this life i live. so here i've been in this bubble, enjoying up to this point, but i guess it's time to pop, time to move, time to release. somewhere along this road i've been traveling, i picked up new pieces, and i've let old ones go, i've picked up some new wonderful things, some unexpected, and some that i shouldn't have, i've let go of things holding me back, some that i wish i could find again, and some i have no idea when they left. i need to go back, pick up those things i shouldn't have lost of myself, and trade them in for the pieces, i shouldn't have exchanged with. but you can't go back, i can't redo. i just have to hope somewhere along this road, i can keep moving, get outside of this bubble, and i can let go again, and pick up greater things. i have to hope that my roads cross with the ones i love the most, and that at points i'll allow them to walk with me, and at others, i'm strong enough to walk alone. i just need courage, to release, to be free. to be who i was truly designed to be. to feel, alive, and apart. to just be a free, open hearted, person along this road that is only my own, in this life that was molded at these moments, just for me. but my feet are stopped, i can't seem to move. maybe tomorrow.....